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Finding the right person with whom you can share your life has never been an easy process. While connecting to individuals has become a bit more convenient thanks to online dating platforms and social media, dating is still a fairly complex process. One common myth is that there is a perfect person out there for everyone and that finding the person will lead to a fairytale ending of living happily ever after. In contrast, relationships require work and compromise from both partners and ultimately, the most important thing one can do when dating is to be authentic and open to the possibility of building a meaningful connection with someone who shares the same values and interests.
Don’t…take someone else for granted! Like you, the other person is trying to date in difficult times and don’t want their time wasted, so be considerate. If something doesn’t feel right, be honest and give the chance for you both to move on. Do…set healthy boundaries. Those who feel they give more than they receive in dating and relationships, may have difficulties setting healthy boundaries. It could be time to work on yourself first. There is plenty of help available like the Made My Date ‘Coaching for Dating’ service, to set boundaries and provide tools to help improve your dating.
Do you have an ex who has been hanging around for years or a f*ckboy that’s been messing with your head? What about those people you text when you’re feeling lonely or bored or who you think you might be interested in someday? I call these people the “maybes:” the exes, previous dates, and “it’s complicated” relationships that didn’t work out the first time around, but you keep their number in your phone “just in case” or are hoping something will change.
Furthermore, a guy who is trying too hard to impress a girl might agree with everything she says, thinking that disagreeing might make the girl not like him. In a nutshell, guys who feel they need to impress a woman think that they are in an inferior position, and as such, they need to do all it takes to measure up. And the downside to this is that it makes you come off as needy. Out of the need to impress, most guys will talk too much about themselves and their achievements, lie to make themselves look good, over-flatter the girl, etc., all of which will quickly make them a bore to the girl. One of the frequently asked questions on Google about dating is “how to get a girl to have sex with you on a first date.” This is one of the biggest mistakes guys make with dating. You see, if your mind is already on how you’ll have sex with a girl right from the first date, that’s going to affect how you relate with her.
Some guys don’t know what makes women tick either because they don’t have a good relationship with women or because they don’t spend some time observing them. The thing is, women and men think differently on many grounds. And if you’re too self-absorbed as a guy, thinking the same things that will impress you will impress a girl, you’re going to get disappointed a lot with women. Most of the things that turn a woman on are surprising and counterintuitive to most men. And in this article, we’re going to be discussing 10 of them. As much as it is good for a man to be dominant and masculine, showing vulnerability once in a while can make your woman feel that special bond with you.
Consider a low-key coffee, tea, a walk, or a drink instead of dinner: Instead of meeting for dinner on the first date, choose an activity that is potentially shorter, and more relaxed like a walk or a coffee. That way, if you realize after 45 minutes that you just aren’t compatible, you’re not committed to a longer (and potentially expensive!) dinner that may be unpleasant and awkward for both parties. If the date goes well, you can continue to cocktail or segue to dinner and continue the conversation. While it’s easy to add a snack or a bite, it’s more difficult to extricate yourself from dinner.
FYI: Being alone is a good thing. A single relationship status or even just time spent on our own allows us to turn inward, explore our truest desires, and get to know ourselves better. When we know ourselves and what we want, our dating lives become more fulfilling, successful, and fun. Any amount of time alone can be invested to understand what we want out of a partner, but more importantly, it can make us feel so whole we don’t need a partner. Let me go on a quick tangent about a few outdated dating rules that we really should ditch, like, yesterday. To start, my least favorites of all dating rules are “Don’t kiss on the first date” and the “Three-date rule.” Let’s just throw out any rules that imply that what you want to do with your body and when you want to do it are not up to you. Make your own rules based on comfortability and what you’re feeling.
There’s something about the end of one year and the beginning of a new one that naturally inspires you to take stock of your old habits and start some smarter ones. This well-researched phenomenon is called the “fresh start effect” — landmarks, like a new year, motivate people to set goals. If your goal involves figuring out how to find love in 2022, I’ve got news for you: you don’t have to spend hours tirelessly swiping on those dating apps to attain that happily ever after. In fact, many of the best dating tips I have to offer have nothing to do with looking for other singles, but rather, working on yourself. The more time and effort you put into examining and changing the patterns that are keeping you “stuck,” the more likely you are to recognize real love with lasting potential when you find it. In short, it’s time to turn inward. What shortcomings may be preventing you from attracting the partner you desire? What unhealthy beliefs or tendencies are driving you toward toxic people? How can you build yourself up so that you have the confidence to go after what you want, and the resilience to handle rejection when it doesn’t work out?
So, what’s your pattern? Do you procrastinate on committing until the other person gets fed up and leaves? Do you get friend-zoned with every woman you like? Do you keep ending up with narcissists, cheaters, or flakes? It’s time to figure out why you’re making these decisions. Once you understand the root cause of your tendencies, you can start making modifications that promote healthier relationships. For example, if you always end up in the friend zone because you don’t have the confidence needed to make a move, then you’ll want to focus on building your self-esteem. By the way — a dating coach can help you with this. I’ve coached many men on being more assertive and self-assured in their dating lives so they can find love, not just friendship, with the woman of their dreams.